There were times in my life when I just couldn’t take anymore and wanted to give up. I wanted to end it all. I wanted to run away. I wanted to disappear. But then I would see my kids and I could hear them call me, “Mom” and goddamnit they were everything. 

My kids will never know just how many times they have saved me. A love like that is the greatest joy, and that love helped see me through the darkest hours. 

I dare not let them know, though, that would be too great a burden to carry. Damnit their laughter and smiles and the way they care for each other is everything to me.