Tuesday, May 11, 2010
And just like that...make no mistake about it!
A Beastie Boys song comes to mind...Sabotage. Yes, it was me that ultimately set this in motion. I got all girlie about an incident and let's just say my approach was less than tactful. Needless, to say - it got him to thinking. He isn't ready for a relationship. He doesn't want to answer to anyone. I expressed some discontent for the way I feel he treated me. And it got him thinking...so now, it's over. Not let's slow down or give me some time because I really like you and I don't know where to go from here. No - it's just done. Because any expression of feelings from a woman is taboo. Let's face it. There were odds stacked against us to begin with - like age. He's 30, I'm older. He's a devoted bachelor, I'm a hopeless romantic. Bruised and damaged. Worst part is I really, really liked him. Still do. Cried for a while, crying again - because I'm like a lovelorn teenager. (and all sensitive) I want to say at least he was honest - but it fucking hurts. So now the walls go flying up. Because sadly, I thought but this might lead to something. Just answer me this - how do go from telling someone you really like them and you could fall for them and you can't stop thinking about them to nothing? This is going to hurt, but I will wear a smile and pick myself up. I have pride - I always find my way...always. Make no mistake about it!
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