not today

I have recently become obsessed with reporting current weather conditions for where I live, or for literally wherever I am at that moment. 

In some ways, I’m a pain in the ass for how often I hit the submit button; but on the flip side, I’m assisting the weather app team (typically standard on every iPhone) to provide accurate information. 

I am trying to keep my mind and fingers busy when picking up my phone, and this helps me exercise restraint from social media apps. Also it’s quite possible that the weather app team might be considering removing that very same option to report any weather related issues, due to my frequency of reporting.

This gives me a little perspective on how often I pick up my phone. I’m also trying to be present in my life, so I’m trying not to pick up my phone as often. 

I think the weather app team hates me, so on occasion I press submit based an imagined scenario in my head and purely out of spite. 

Another reflection I see looking back at me, when I hold up that confounded fucking mirror to my inner soul. 

Sometimes I just want the fuckery to end and for the weather app team to get their shit together, because clearly they don’t have anyone else in my area that is as considerate and benign and willing to update them.

I can see I have taken this too far, but I also don’t see myself slowing down either. This experience (though thoroughly out of control) has likely inspired one addiction to replace yet another. But for now, it is far more entertaining and satisfying than social media. And I think this says a lot about the people I have surrounded myself with on social media. 

That’s a dig, since I recently turned into a curmudgeon old man, apparently. 

In fact I just paused writing this to report a more current account of the weather. So as you can see it’s already a problem. But it’s really only fun when the weather is inclement. 

The inclement weather is my favorite, especially if enjoying it out on my enclosed patio. The birds chirp and sing quite a bit, and many of them seem to be flying around in an effort to find a place to settle somewhere and ride it out. Though sometimes when it’s really windy and there’s no lightning just before the storm hits, they do tend to glide flawlessly on gusts and breezes under brooding clouds. It’s lovely to watch.

Curmudgeon old man my ass!! I’m a tree huggin, bird watchin, weather reporter. 

If the weather was like this all the time, I would be outside more. But if it’s not storming; walking outside on a hot sunny day in Florida, can be like wrapping a wet electric blanket around yourself. Fuck that. I am a native to the area and while I used to love outdoor activities, I opt for air conditioning now. It’s just too fucking hot and I don’t want a heatstroke. You have to drink excessive amounts of fluids and water to live in Florida or you will die outside. I say fluids (and that isn’t careless), but remember drinking alcohol outdoors all day can make you sick as fuck. Back to being a curmudgeon.

It’s supposed to be raining, but it hasn’t started yet. And according to the weather app it was supposed to start raining 7 minutes ago. Do you see what I am dealing with…? Yes, I reported it. Yes, I’m a little disappointed the rain hasn’t started yet.

I sometimes feel guilty about hitting the submit button; don’t worry, it’s ephemeral. I imagine eventually I will get bored with it, but not today.